A Portrait

A recent discovery that I am afraid of photographs has brought home that perhaps I need therapy of some sort.

Let me be clear, this is not a fear of the photograph itself, but, rather, photographs relating to my life. I have many camera films that I have never printed, and, quite frankly, I do not want to see them. And I do not like to look at the photographs I have. The thought of looking at photographs of my past makes me feel nauseous and anxious – as if I have failed to complete something very important. Something has been left undone. What is worse is that I suspect that what I am now is the very thing I failed to complete.

The good news is that I have decided to continue to suppress these feelings, so things are looking up for me.

Scenarios From Out Of Town

I often sit and think about how I would react should a certain things happen or be said to me. This escalates, and I get angry about it. I then realise that half and hour has passed me by, and I have been sitting getting angry about something that has never happened, and probably never will. This might be what mad people do.