Nihilist; Pessimist; Miserablist; Complainer; Destroyer of Humanity. These are accusations expected to be thrown my way due to my tendency to complain at times.
What a mistake this is. Often the complaints of daily life, as tiresome as they may sound to those listening, are not ones that want to simply destroy. In fact, these complaints and hatred of the world are often those that want to rebuild (and if it involves any destruction, it is to enable something else).
Of course, it cannot be denied that anyone who really is a nihilist, moaner, or destroyer of humanity would refute these accusations. Therefore my testimony cannot be trusted. Besides, even if I were trusted, unless the destroying and rebuilding is actually taking place, what use is this? In fact, without the latter taking place, one could rightly accuse me of being a pessimistic nihilist, with a tendency to complain alot. It just goes to show that often in life we do not see the forest for the trees.
21.6.08
Notes on Domination: The Mediation of Colour
When something, anything, this or that, is put to use, it signals the impending destruction of mankind. This is especially so when something so natural and so beautiful, that which we often take for granted, is seized upon and thrust upon us with force, trying to maintain the feeling of naturalness, hiding the manipulation (or even not hiding it).
Colours are a fine example of this: that which is to be looked at with pleasure and admiration, beyond our grasp, yet not out of reach. We have the gift of seeing colours, the relationship between the human eyes and the colour should be direct between those two only – no third party should be involved.
Colour is suddenly put to use. Red signals danger! Black signals death! White signals purity! Yellow signals happiness! Blue signals a boy! Pink signals a girl! Grey signals unsure territory that one should stay away from! Cultural lying has ensured that colour comes with the mediation of a third authoritative party, who seeks to control your minds. Even the shades of colour are put to use. The prison or the asylum use this colour to impose a feeling onto the deranged or criminal – a crackdown on crime with pastels (though this is once captured, before then only the strongest, most dominating colours are used).
People in homes in pursuit of the mood they long for, take heed.
Colours are a fine example of this: that which is to be looked at with pleasure and admiration, beyond our grasp, yet not out of reach. We have the gift of seeing colours, the relationship between the human eyes and the colour should be direct between those two only – no third party should be involved.
Colour is suddenly put to use. Red signals danger! Black signals death! White signals purity! Yellow signals happiness! Blue signals a boy! Pink signals a girl! Grey signals unsure territory that one should stay away from! Cultural lying has ensured that colour comes with the mediation of a third authoritative party, who seeks to control your minds. Even the shades of colour are put to use. The prison or the asylum use this colour to impose a feeling onto the deranged or criminal – a crackdown on crime with pastels (though this is once captured, before then only the strongest, most dominating colours are used).
People in homes in pursuit of the mood they long for, take heed.
8.6.08
Bees
Bees are wonderful little (but by no means inferior) creatures. Intelligent, graceful, caring and always busy; the bee knows how to use it's time well. How can one not hold in high esteem a creature that likes to spend its days making honey, buzzing around colourful flowers and hunting sticky sweets? All this, and the perpetuation of mankind!
7.6.08
The Pleasure of a Tickle
One of the most pleasurable things in the world is to experience a gentle tickle, a tickle that is like a gentle stroke. This is not just for the back, it can be on the arms, legs, even chin, and feels wonderful. Tickles on the side of the body can be nice, but often it tickles a little too much, thus interrupting the pleasure.
Getting hold of these tickles can be a problem. One cannot ask a friend, even family (unless you are a child) to give such pleasure. A spouse may give tickles, but not for long (at the beginning of the relationship they are always willing to give them for 30 minutes, sometimes more. Later in the relationship you have to beg for 2 minute's worth). You can only get so far tickling yourself – not only is the pleasure taken away from having to actually undertake the tickling, but as tickler, you know exactly where the tickle is about to happen – no sweet surprises there. Plus you cannot comfortably reach your own back.
A tickle machine is out of the question – it must be a human touch, otherwise one feels sick to the stomach, and guilty of such an obscenity. Pets cannot do it either. Though they sure as hell have no problems accepting them, even from strangers in the street.
I suppose the biggest problem is that the tickler finds it boring and gets a sore arm after a while (or worse still, wants the tickled to reciprocate). Until this state of affairs can be changed it will remain difficult to obtain these gentle touches.
NB This tickle is NOT of a sexual nature. If that is what you are looking for, you are in the wrong place.
Getting hold of these tickles can be a problem. One cannot ask a friend, even family (unless you are a child) to give such pleasure. A spouse may give tickles, but not for long (at the beginning of the relationship they are always willing to give them for 30 minutes, sometimes more. Later in the relationship you have to beg for 2 minute's worth). You can only get so far tickling yourself – not only is the pleasure taken away from having to actually undertake the tickling, but as tickler, you know exactly where the tickle is about to happen – no sweet surprises there. Plus you cannot comfortably reach your own back.
A tickle machine is out of the question – it must be a human touch, otherwise one feels sick to the stomach, and guilty of such an obscenity. Pets cannot do it either. Though they sure as hell have no problems accepting them, even from strangers in the street.
I suppose the biggest problem is that the tickler finds it boring and gets a sore arm after a while (or worse still, wants the tickled to reciprocate). Until this state of affairs can be changed it will remain difficult to obtain these gentle touches.
NB This tickle is NOT of a sexual nature. If that is what you are looking for, you are in the wrong place.
To Return, Again
Dear Reader,
The problem I have when writing is that I begin with a thought and from thereon simply write, with the excitement that I am proving my point so perfectly. When I come to the end of writing I suddenly realise that my argument has gone in a 360° circle. My argument has, in fact, proved the very point I was so against at the beginning. The strangest thing being that the content of my argument is not even inconsistent. I am then faced with the question, “What is the right thing to do, and who should it be right for?” Often I have to re-think the whole situation. Often I keep this written piece for my eyes only (some of the few secrets I have in my life). Other times I accept the fate of my theses, with the worry that all those reading will regard me with certain ridicule.
Whilst I cannot at any stage refer to a form of a priori determination by which this writing would be guided, I do hope that this will not cause any distrust between us.
Unassuredly Yours,
The problem I have when writing is that I begin with a thought and from thereon simply write, with the excitement that I am proving my point so perfectly. When I come to the end of writing I suddenly realise that my argument has gone in a 360° circle. My argument has, in fact, proved the very point I was so against at the beginning. The strangest thing being that the content of my argument is not even inconsistent. I am then faced with the question, “What is the right thing to do, and who should it be right for?” Often I have to re-think the whole situation. Often I keep this written piece for my eyes only (some of the few secrets I have in my life). Other times I accept the fate of my theses, with the worry that all those reading will regard me with certain ridicule.
Whilst I cannot at any stage refer to a form of a priori determination by which this writing would be guided, I do hope that this will not cause any distrust between us.
Unassuredly Yours,
Me and You and Me
The difficulty of being with another has, for me, nothing to do with the commonly expressed complaint of ‘losing one’s identity’. In fact, the problem is perhaps that one has managed to formulate their identity, and show this as fully as possible to the person they are with. This is problematic as it then becomes impossible to ever do this with anyone else. By being able to express oneself so fully to another can only lead to the downfall of relationships with others. A sanctuary at home, but one must always remain there.
10.5.08
GSOH
I would like to know what the value is of having a “good sense of humour.” When someone craves a “good sense of humour” what is it they really want? The person with a GSOH (and this abbreviation, as awful as it is, is very appropriate for this personality trait) is someone that refuses to challenge that which is put in front of them. Someone who will join in the fun, have a good chuckle (even at some naughty stuff). Someone who will make fun of a friend (in the most jovial fun-loving way), and is prepared to be made fun of. Someone who will laugh along appropriately with the crowd they are with, even if it is accompanied by feelings of guilt inside . A gutless person whose main concern is being liked and being safe. The individual with a GSOH will go to heaven (but can go to hell).
Why on earth is the description of a “GSOH” a compliment? Why would a person seek this in a companion? Is it the fear that if a GSOH is not specified they might get someone who has a bad sense of humour? Worse, none at all? Why does that personality trait take preference over many other ones?
The person with a good sense of humour is, quite frankly, a bore who has nothing to offer but meaningless, untrustworthy laughs.
Why on earth is the description of a “GSOH” a compliment? Why would a person seek this in a companion? Is it the fear that if a GSOH is not specified they might get someone who has a bad sense of humour? Worse, none at all? Why does that personality trait take preference over many other ones?
The person with a good sense of humour is, quite frankly, a bore who has nothing to offer but meaningless, untrustworthy laughs.
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